Monday, November 7, 2011
Kim Kardashian Reconsidering Divorce
It comes as no surprise to me - Hoagie The Dog - that the Kardashian girl with the big behind is reconsidering her divorce to mediocre NBA player Kris Humphries. According to reports, the Kardashian girl put her big ass on an airplane and flew to Minnesota to chat with Kris over the weekend. It comes as no surprise to me, because I spoke at length with Kris on Friday. As an advisor to the stars, I am often sought out for my perspective and guidance - especially on all matters of the heart. As a matter of fact, I have a specific expertise in mediating quarrels between irrelevant celebrities with little or no talent. I told Kris that he and the Kardashian girl have so much to offer the world as a couple - that they simply cannot give up. I mean, she is on television and he scores nearly 6 points per game. That is a powerful combination that you don't find every day. I think that she also has a perfume. Not sure if he does. Yet. So, I am encouraged that he is taking my advice and trying to save this important relationship and thus make everything right with the world. Those two really are an inspiration to us all. I also suggested that he spend a little more time in the driveway working on his free throws.