I Want to be a Flasher

Clearly, there are a lot of advantages to not being held to the societal defined expectations of wearing clothes in public.  Very clearly.  I can go whereever I wish and never have to worry about pants and whether or not I remembered to put them on.  I just can't imagine the stress that would cause a person.  However, there is a downside to the expectation that I be nude:  I am unable to engage in the act of flashing.  I would make a great flasher.  I could really envision myself walking down the street on the end of my leash, wearing a non-descript tan trench coat, appearing distracted, and opening it up and freaking someone or something out.  What an adrenaline rush that would be!  I bet I could really freak out the neighborhood squirrels.  I might send them all into therapy - if squirrel therapy exists as a recognized medical practice.  However, I would not be completely nude under my trench coat.  I would wear a tie - something striped perhaps - hanging from my neck.  I like to stay classy and sophisticated at all times.